This is the worst!

No!! NOOOOOO!!!! Food Lady is gone! She left this morning with a suitcase! I hate suitcases! They are evil! Where could she be? She is usually back home by now so that she can cater to my every whim. What is going on??

Rice Chips and Seat Stealer said horrible things to me this morning after Food Lady left. They said that she hates me and is never coming back! Obviously they are wrong because why would anyone hate me? I am the king of cats! They also said that they are going to put stickers on me and make me wear paper ties because I can't get them off my collar. Clearly, they must be punished. I started by sitting in Seat Stealer's computer chair all morning so she couldn't do any work. Maybe later I will fight her. They have to learn not to say such terrible things. Because Food Lady is coming back soon. Right? Any minute now she'll come back and I won't have to put up with these people anymore. Any minute...